1989 dodge carravan

Sorry it has bin so long since I actually added to this. I have big doing daddy things and not bin inclined to do this. Yesterday I watched the best show on earth. Lost, is a show that I just love. It has the right amount of comedy and drama mixed with suspense. But. One thing I am beginning to want is a show that wraps up a big plot item before the end of the season. Lost has 7 or 8 major plots going and it did not wrap any of them up! Instead it gave us a doosey (taken from the word Duisenberg (a luxury car company in the 30s) of a plot twist! It was intriguing but also a little frustrating! Now instead of us having some juke little thing to talk about till September, we must all stare at each other for 2 more months, saying nothing!! I want lost to come back on now!!!! If they don’t solve some of the story in the next season, than I will be irate and probably blog it!


ARBITRATOR: A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonalds.
AVOIDABLE: Wat a bullfighter tried to do.
BERNADETTE The act of torching a mortgage.
BURGLARIZE What a crook sees with.
CONTROL: short, ugly inmate.
COUNTERFEITERS: Workers who put together kitchen cabinets.
ECLISE: What an English barber does for a living.
EYEDROPPER: A clumsy ophthalmologist.
HEROES: What a guy in a boat does.
LEFTBANK: What the robber did when his bag was full of money.
MISTY: How golfers create divots.
PARADOX: Two physicians.
PARASITES: What you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower.
PHARMACIST: A helper on the farm.
POLARIZE: What penguins see with.
PRIMATE: Removing your spouse from in front of the TV.
BELIEF: What trees do in the Spring.
RUBBERNECK: What you do to relax your wife.
SELFISH: What the owner of a seafood store does.
SUDAFED: Brought litigation against a government official.


I once had a 1989 dodge caravan that I bought for $3.00 (not a misprint three dollars) and fixed it up and soled it for $2500.00
Good for me!

this kills me

not trying to make light of a tragic sickness, this is just something that amuses me.

question for all

I will give a set of glass pack muffilers to the first persone who can tell me the true history bekind the wikkid bad name "cracker cats"


YUCK

Darryell Ulrickson

Yesterday I went to a wedding and it wasn't too bad. Samantha Dennis and Vince Andersen tied the proverbial knot in a touching ceremony. This one wasn't a bad wedding because I knew a great deal of people there, since Samantha is a cousin of my fam. Ralphs, so I knew many of the extended family that was there. It was kind of fun.Also, Darrell and I got to be the MCs afterwards. We played around a bit, including doing a skit of how Vince proposed. I played Vince, and as such, Darrell wore a wig and a dress. A dress with a green flowery print all over it. A dress that did not fit around his shoulders and which featured sleeve holes that would not let his hands through because they were too small. It was fun, though. Not the wearing a dress part per say, but doing the skit in general. Although, I have to say it was too hot. It's Darrells fault for wearing black, but still. That was ridiculous. Actually, it was only too hot when standing in the direct sunlight, or when the breeze stopped blowing in the windows during the reception. So it was only too hot about half of the time. Which was still tough for the bride in a dress that featured enough material to make a decent sized tent (it had a train on it, and there always seems to be so much extra material on wedding dresses, like the bride is trying to hide in there). And all of the bridesmaids got sunburned on their shoulders. Felt kinda bad for them.Well, cowabunga and all that. See ya next time.Oh yeah, Darrells name was spelled in the program like it is in the Title of this BLOG. That is the most unique spelling of his name ever!

my kind of humour

Baked BeansOnce upon a time, there lived a man who had a terrible passion for baked beans. He loved them, but they always had an embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction on him.One day he met a girl and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would marry, he thought to himself, she'll never go through with the marriage with me carrying on like this, so he made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans.Shortly after that they were married.A few months later, on the way home from work, his car broke down and since they lived in the country, he called his wife and told her that he would be late because he had to walk. On his way home, he passed a small cafe and the wonderful aroma of baked beans overwhelmed him.Since he still had several miles to walk he figured he could walk off any ill affects before he got home. So he went in and ordered, and before leaving had 3 extra large helpings ofbaked beans. All the way home he putt-putted. By the time he arrived home he felt reasonably safe.His wife met him at the door and seemed somewhat excited. She exclaimed, "Darling, I have the most wonderful surprise for you for dinner tonight!" She put a blindfold on him, and led him to his chair at the head of the table and made him promise not to peak.At this point he was beginning to feel another one coming on. Just as his wife was about to remove the blindfold, the telephone rang. She again made him promise not to peek until she returned, and away she went to answer the phone. While she was gone, he seized the opportunity. He shifted his weight to one leg and let go. It was not only loud, but ripe as a rotten egg. He had a hard time breathing, so he felt for his napkin and fanned the air about him.He had just started to feel better, when another urge came on. He raised his leg and RRIIIPPPP !!! It sounded like a diesel engine revving, and smelled worse. To keep from gagging, he tried fanning his arms a while, hoping the smell would dissipate. He got another urge. This was a real blue ribbon winner, the windows shook, the dishes on the table rattled and a minute later the flowers on the table were dead.While keeping an ear tuned in on the conversation in the hallway, and keeping his promise of staying blindfolded, he carried on like this for the next ten minutes, farting and fanning each time with his napkin. When he heard the phone farewells he neatly laid his napkin on his lap and folded his hands on top of it. Smiling contentedly, he was the picture of innocence when his wife walked in.Apologizing for taking so long, she asked if he had peeked at the dinner table. After assuring her he had not peeked, she removed the blindfold and yelled, "SURPRISE!!!"To his shock and horror, there were twelve dinner guests seated around the table for his surprise birthday party.

heh

The following were taken off of actual police car videos around the country.........
"Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch out after you wear them awhile."
"Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document." "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired." "
So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?" "
Yes, Sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh ... did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"
"Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."
"The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"
"Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey poop."
"Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."
"Just how big were those two beers?" "
No sir we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want." "
I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail."
"You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here.

1986 prelude

so today i did $140.00 worth of oil changes on my cars! why so much? Cuz they all got a fully synthetic oil change sept for my f150 cuz its too old and it leaks. kinda like scott. anyhoo, the reason i did synthetic is cuz it is a much better oil than standerd minerial oil, some people think it is just a wast of money but to them i say "stupid veggys" It dosent mean anything but it offends some and if your offended then you must have a good reason! Right?
i used moble 1 I believe it to be the best oil on the planit so i used it! synthetis oil never louses its viscosity.......ever. it only gets dirty. but never breakes down. All mineral oil breakes down at 75 hrs running time or between 3-5 thousand k if you do the math accounting for sitting at red lights and in the case of chevy, sitting as a mechanic scrubs her/his head figguring out what the stupid engineere was thinking when he put that peace there!! synthetic is just beter. some people use it for more time than mineral oil but that is not wise cus dirt is still dirt
I once bought a 1986 prelude. It had 2 carbs and it was fast (kinda, it was front wheel drive fast wich is to say slow!) I only drove it once and soled it the next day cuz i was bored of it
am I weired?

1981 ford f150 4x4

10 ways to scare your neighbors

1.) Order pizza and other food to their house and pick it up at their doorstep claiming that
you don't have a phone.
hello
2.) Stand over the plants in your yard with a hose and Scream, "I have your life in my
hands, bow down to me!". Then point at each one and declare them good or bad
plants,while watering the bad ones.

3.)Bring them restraining orders on inanimate objects in their house. (ie: chairs, books,
lamps, etc.)

4.) Ask them if you can put your trash in their cans, if they ask why say, "Mine are full of
bodies", then stutter and say, "I uh mean other garbage." walk away laughing
hysterically.

5.)Patrol the perimeter of your yard while carrying a broom. If they come close state that
their is a 3 foot neutral area between the two yards.

6.) At night transplant the plants in their garden. In the morning say, "looks like they're on
the move again."

7.) When they're watching TV, pull a lawn chair behind their window. Sit down with popcorn
and a dink and ask them if they could open a window so you can hear too.

8.)Build snowmen with name tags of your neighbours. Each day hack off a different part of
their body.

9.) Use your TV remote to change the channels on their TV from outside. If asked why,
say you protest such programs. (The more educational the program the better.)

10.) Dig shallow graves at night filling your yard with brown grave patches. Make
markers out of household applainces.

I once had a 1981 ford f150 4x4. The name of the truck was officially was Sampson but everyone called it clunk! it was awsome and it did a good burnout it had no dash and it had a 300 ci. 6 cylinder. (best engine ever made) it was green and it made me happy........yup .......I soled it

1978 chev halfton

So, here I sit waiting for a class at the church to start and I am tired. I got lots of sleep last night so it must be because I am a little under the weather. My efforts last night to replace a window in the truck have failed so I will try again tomorrow. My garage is a place of peace for me. I love cars and working on them. The time spent in the garage helps center me. Lots of prep for ministry gets done there. Lots of bible study’s get planed there and sometimes I actually get a car finished
But not last night. I was sick so I spent my time installing a 40 amp relay for my headlights (makes them WAY brighter) not exactly technical but at least it was basic……… or whatever

I once had a 1978 Chevy half ton that was brown and ran good. It did a good burnout and I installed LOTS of lights on it! I soled it to John Petkau and that was the last good Chevy I ever owned
Chevy sucks
Jeff is a prude

hmmmmmm!

Darrell Ulriksen just smashed the window out of my truck!!

1975 chev halfton

its 7:45 am
why am I up? I dont know, I just woke up. My boy is still sleeping and so is my wife but I am up.Oh well. Everyone was over at my house lastnight and it was fun. I always love a party so thius was right up my alley! I am slowley becoming healthy again (bad cough and a wease) but it aint hapining fast enough. Today my wife is going out to get the next Harry Potter book. This is a big deal for her and I am glad for her! I dont read many books but I do have a few favrouts! I like "The raft" i read it about once a year "All quiet on the western front" Also about once a year "Old Yeller" I tend to read about 2 or 3 ministery books a month. they all tend (although not always) to be youth related.
So there
I do so read! And you thought I dident!
I once bought a 1975 chev pickup in saskatoon for $400 I drove it to Regina and it took 3 days to get it there (a 3 hr trip) It cooked the fuel pump and had to do a side of the road fix! I then soled it to Chris Ulriksen and his brother Darrell (Chris will never read this cuz he is too good for all of us!) who promptly tried to drive it back to saskatoon with me and his brother in it loaded with everything they owned and my motorcycle (we thought that one through) This is funny cuz it only had 2 bucket seats out of a car in it to sit on! Darrell has 1 butcheek on a seat and thats all! We killed the camshaft on the way back so Cheiss and Darrell had to rebuild the top of the engine!

1981 malabu

im back and covered with ant bites
more later
I once had a 1981 malibu 3 speed standerd. It did a good burnout............. nothing actually broke on that car so i soled it!
cant have that........... a good car
HA not me!!
ant bites hurt